It may be December, but the heat's on. And we have Henin to thank.

"I'm back" declared a boisterous Henin. "Who wants some."

Henin is returning from an 18-month "break". She spent the first 12 months of the break touring the undergound fighting circuits of central and eastern Asia, participating in tournaments not unlike the one in the Van Damme movie Bloodsport.


"Don't get me wrong, tennis is my first love," clarifies Henin. "But there's just something in mixed martial arts that tennis lacks. Something intangible. I can't put my finger on it. Actually ya, I can-- it's the beating people. That's definitely it. You just don't get that in tennis anymore."

After dominating the Asian bareknuckle scene, Henin campaigned for and won the Czech prime ministership. When asked whether not being able to speak the Czech language was an obstacle, she answered in the negative.

"I just ran a really strong campaign. The Czech really seemed to take a liking to me."

She based her campaign mostly around threats of violence.

Upon winning the election, she immediately declared her resignation. When asked why, Henin answered "I mean, life's a journey. Beating up Asian hordes and winning the Czech prime ministership were thrilling chapters in the book of my life, but it's time to move on, to return to what I know best: tennis."